Sometimes I don't sleep

Sometimes, like tonight (I mean, like this morning) I don't go to sleep when I'm supposed to.

Ok it's not like I'm supposed to per se
I live alone and I don't have someone telling me to go to sleep
but let's say I don't even try to climb into bed and lay my pretty head on one of my billions of pillows and fall asleep when it is socially acceptable to do so.

Instead, I do some, or all, of the following:
* watch t.v. online (oh how I wish I still had DVR)
(and curse too much during ALL of the Grey's finale as I thoroughly freaked out - WHO SAW ANY OF THAT COMING?!?!)
* buy MC (Morgan Canfield. man I'm getting creative.) a present.
(for our, ahem, 9 month anniversary coming up. well that's my excuse anyways, I just like buying him things)
* buy me (that's Julie Bennett) a present.
(I like to make things fair. scratch that, I just wanted to buy something.)
* pay bills. yes. pay bills. ugh.
* facebook. duh, that's a given.
* avoid peeing.
(If anyone knows me they know how much I pee. They also know how much I think it is a waste of time. therefore: avoiding it.)
* blogstalk. a little something I like to call: wasting time.
* facials.
(when Morg opens the gym the next day {like tomorrow} he leaves to go sleepybye a little earlier...
so I like to slather honey and yogurt on my face and look like a monster. my face loves me for it.)

since all of those things have been done, I believe it might be time for me to hit the hay.

but before that, here's a gem from MC & I's trip to Ryan & Lara's wedding last weekend:
ok nite.

dear life,

right now i really love you.

actually, right now my eyes are really heavy

and my brain is really slow moving

so right now you are a little bleary-eyed.

but other than that, you are awesome.

because i finally got to see my family

in my new stomping grounds

and show off my hotter than hott boyfriend

who i love more than a billion reeses cups

or a thousand peaunut butter and honey sandwiches

or 12 cases of diet coke

ok well more than anything really...

and my family got to see that love in person.

and see how wonderful he treats me

and really experience my happiness.

and its because you let me have amazing friends

that make me laugh until my back hurts

and i have to sit down to catch my breath

and its because you help me remember how important little adventures are

and enjoying the small things is like, the best thing ever.

like sunday night adventures with morgface

and being able to notice all those little things he does for me

and listen to story after wonderful story from his (dominican republic) mission

and begin again to get so giddy over planning

the amazing things we will do there in 2.5 months.

and though maybe my alarm clock didn't go off this morning,

life, i'm so effin happy that i can sit here and remember those

amazing moments

and revel in them again, and again.

love,

me.

Life = Hella Crazy = Hella Awesome.

I don't use the word 'hella' in normal conversation, but for some reason I feel OK typing it and using it to try and describe my life at this point in time and the level of crazy and awesome it is at.

I can't begin to catch up, or fill in, or update at this point. But I can tell you what is coming up!

First - Morgan and I are going to see this bachelorette:

Become un-bacheloretted (word? yes) by this boy:

And we're really excited :)

Second - Morgan and I are going to drive (yes, you read that right. drive.) to NC to see my family

In particular, to see this little brother graduate from highschool (man I feel old):

Third - I'm going to have the first annual reunion with these girls in July:

And I couldn't be more thrilled :)

And Fourth - this couple is going to spend 10 days getting their tropical vacation on

on this island (just in case you don't recognize it, psh, its the Dominican Republic!!)

Phew. 4 trips. 4 months. I'm ready.

Green Slime Bread.

So throughout our dating days - or as Morgan likes to call it "courting" - Morg has opened my eyes to a lot of things or just introduced me to things I never really saw myself doing - for example: Making (and eating) Zucchini Bread! It may seem small (and it is) but I can honestly say that I was perfectly content with never coming in contact with zucchini - let alone eating it. But alas, I have a boyfriend that loves everything food related - especially veggies. And when he found out I hated anything squash related he decided to broaden my horizons. So for date night we baked Zucchini Bread. I wish I would have taken a picture during - Morgan took the honors of grating the nasty green slimy zucchinis because well - he knew I wouldn't. And when we started putting everything together - well he had to finish it because I TRIED to touch it... but I could not through with it. The only thing that kept coming to my mind was that green slime from Nickelodeon that poured on all those kids during commericials and stuff. Well thankfulyl he powered through and finished the job - but I added my own touch: chocolate chips! :) I knew anything probably tasted good with those in them - and I was right. So to make this long story even longer: I loved it. So thankyou my love for helping me come outside my comfort zone :)

Oh another example of Morgan introducing me to new and amazing things I never thought I would do?? - We're going to the Dominican Republic in August for 10 days!!! Morgman served his mission there almost 2 1/2 years ago and well, I need a tropical vacation! We're really excited... to say the least.

What I'm up to...

I'm missing this man in my life... and he only left 12 hours ago! ;-)

I've been in Chicago this past week for work - and will be for the next week too... So morgman came to visit for the weekend :)

Back to it for another long week - but atleast I have the memories of this weekend to daydream about :)

Things I Like

So maybe I haven't been the best candidate for 'happy-go-lucky-ness' lately.

[ like the picture above, on New Year's Eve, where all we could
think about was being happy-go-lucky for the rest of the year! ]

I have been stressed about work. and life in general.

but excited too.

And well, Morgan has midterms this week and although I'm not in school anymore

it stresses me out to see him stressed out

[ love does weird things to you sometimes. ]

But last night as I took a run after work I looked at the sky

ya know the moment between the light blue and the dark grey after a long, rainy day

(I didn't mean for that to rhyme, promise)

well it made me happy.

and that made me think of so many other things that have made me happy in the past week,

and I thought 'I should write them down'

so I can remember, on the days that I am stressed or burnt out or 'down in the dumps'

that there are glimpses, even long, extended moments of happiness that occur.

Things that I've Liked (lately...)

• That sky I was talking about. I was tired from work, I needed to fold my laundry, I needed to anything but be out there running. And then I looked at that clear, greyish blue sky and my mind got that much clearer.
• Calls from Morgface when he is between classes. I know its cliche, but I can't explain the giddy, butterfly feeling I get when I look on my caller ID on my work phone and I see his number. It immediately brings a smile to my face. and then the greeting of various nonexistent people ("Hi, this is Dominoes with your anchovie order" or "Hi, this is your doctor calling, you have a minor problem") brings laughter. And then the recollection of crazy stories from our days so far not only make me laugh, but they make me even more grateful he is in my life.
• Rachael's voicemail. So my best friend, Rachael, is notorious for breaking/losing/forgetting her cell phone, or just not answering it for various other reasons. This time though, she went to California and somehow, someway lost it. (I don't know the real reasoning yet - it's still lost) but I have called her a few times in the past few days to check the phone status, and since the phone has obviously died since being lost, it goes straight to voicemail. I guess I shouldn't like hearing her voicemail, I mean I would love to hear her real voice instead, but hearing that "Hi this is Rachael, call me back whenever you can" message as soon as I press talk just cracks me up. [BTW, I know you'll read this - love you Rach]
• Talking to my parents. I've always been away from either set of my parents throughout my life - or all of them I guess when I was in college - so this whole living away from them thing isn't anything new, but keeping in touch with them has, for some reason, proved to be harder. I notice the times I do get the chance to sit and chat with them are very special to me. I got to do that last night.
• Making things for other people. Since Morg is on his "I'm a bodybuilder diet" all the sweets I make, I now bring to the office. I love the people that I work with, though don't tell them that - they would make fun of me for it ;-) - and being able to show them that in any form makes me feel just a little bit more gracious towards them.

fill in the blank friday

So I have approximately one! hour left at work for this week

and I'm so ready for it to be ZERO!

This week has been crazy/stressful/busy.

But I finally submitted my last assignment

(who has ever heard of taking a difficult exam and completing a bunch of assignments BEFORE going to a class??)

and my brain needs a break.

So again, I'm taking a breather, and filling in my own blanks...

{1.} When I'm nervous I get this weird butterfly/knot/nauseous feeling in my stomach. And I fidget like crazy.

[ One time when I was giving a speech in one of my classes in college a girl in the front row kept signaling me. I didn't know her that well, and I really didn't care why she was doing it at that moment, so I ignored it. Afterwards she came up to me and said that everyone could see me fidgeting with my skirt the whole time - which consisted of me pulling my almost-knee-length-skirt up and down - while I thought that was completely covered by the podium. Very nice, Julie, very nice. ]

{2.} My favorite item in my closet is my pair of Refuge dark blue skinny jeans.

[ They are comfy. They fit perfectly. They go with everything. And they are Morgan's fave too ;-) ]

{3.} Lighting my candles, turning off the lights, and laying on the couch talking to Morgman, is my favorite thing to do when I need to relax.

[ I don't get to relax a whole lot. And neither does Morg. And then obviously we don't get a lot of time to relax together. So when we do get the chance, its like - this big deal. Yeah, we're weird. ]

{4.} My favorite childhood memory is camping with my family.

[ Both sides of my family made it a point to have regular family trips, which I love and cherish, but for some reason the times that we went camping stand out in my mind the most. I think the fact that we spent every moment together - laughing, playing games, snuggling, making s'mores, and complaining about sleeping on the hard-as-a-rock ground - makes it that much more special. ]

{5.} Something you may not know about me is I'm not as outspoken as everyone thinks I am.

[ This is something that I have noticed about myself in the past 8 or 9 months, and I don't necessarily think it's a 'bad' or a ' good' change. I just think more before I talk. *gasp* ]

{6.} A true friend is someone who loves you even when you are being irrational and stupid. And who isn't afraid to tell you that.

[ I can't tell you how many times I have heard "Hey Julie, I love you. A lot. Like a fat kid loves cake. But woman, you are being stupid and irrational." and have been totally grateful for it ]

{7.} Something I hope people think of when they think of me is, "Man that girl is hilarious, she should do stand up, or come to my next party, or I want her to just be there tagging along all day so I could laugh and be happy"

[ hey, a girl can dream, yea? ]