Weird memories and the St. Jude 5k

So I'm a little weird when it comes to memories. Only because I can barely remember anything, and I mean anything, before the age of 10. And since then I do remember a lot of things - but whats weird about it is that I remember the most random things and I remember them essentially in full color. Meaning I remember the place it happened, the people that surrounded me, the conversation that took place, and sometimes even the clothes that were worn. Now, I think this is normal. Morgan, on the other hand, thinks its weird. {but in a good way.... I think. :)}

Ok anyways - I remember this one night in the summer of 2009 - when Morgan and I were not officially 'together' yet - it had been a few months since I had moved here and I had just been to a branch FHE. I know this because there was a big group of us at Buffalo Wild Wings watching the monday  night football game {actually it was pretty much only Morgan and I watching the game and everyone else being loud and obnoxious} ANYways, our friends Lara and Ryan were there {they are married now but were engaged then, and thus in the singles ward with us still} and Lara and I were talking about our work out regimes - or lack thereof - and she told me that she wanted to run the St. Jude half marathon that December and wanted me to do it with her. {psh. she obviously didn't know me that well... yet} Morgan was apparently eavesdropping on the convo and immediatly interjected that he had ran it the year before... to which I promptly rolled my eyes... {ok actually I just made that part up but it is plausible, he was always trying to impress me, and I was always {jokingly} rolling my eyes at him {as I still do}... } - anyways so I just flat out told both of them that I didn't like to run long distances and had never ran in a real race even though I loved to run, and they both started giving me a hard time about it, so I jokingly suggested we start out by doing a few 5ks {lara had also never ran a race either} together... and they both agreed. I was sort of caught off guard, not only that they were serious about it, but that a 6'1" 250 lb guy agreed to run a 5k. So I looked into it and we all signed up for a 5k in September - and blogged about here in October.

Then the rest is pretty much history, since then I've done 6 5ks - {all trained with the Morgman.} Got 1st and 2nd(s) in my age group. Got 126th overall. Got asked "what's wrong, is your leg hurt?" during a race. Gotten cheered on from the sidelines. Got cramps, ear aches, and hunger pains (yep.).  Got 4 medals, a trophy and a ceramic tile (big time right there). Got runners high, courage, confidence.  Even with the {made up} eyeroll he managed to inspire me, and he has every day since.

So fast forward a year and a few months and we found ourselves not at the St. Jude half marathon {he does know me well}, but the 5k and it was so much fun to do together, creating more memories :)



friends from work - janell and nicole also ran
pope was in a boot due to a stress fracture ... from running.



Thanksgiving 2010

So now that it's officially my holiday break I actually have some time to update, since as always I'm way behind, while the Thursday night football game is on in the background and the morgman studies (for his OAR test, oh how I can't wait for that to be over!)

This Thanksgiving I actually didn't travel anywhere - but I did have some special guests - My mom and stepdad! {though below you will not be able to find photo evidence - he was, in fact, present}

So to preface, at this point I had been sick for 2 weeks before they came in - I was feeling a lot better by then, but then my mom called me Wednesday before they left town and they had woke up with sore throats, headaches, etc - it was so sad. Then to top it all off Morgan got the flu bug on Thanksgiving morning. He got a fever and was sick all day - it was so sad. He was hurting pretty much the rest of the weekend. 

BUT we still managed to have a lot of fun and enjoy our time together.

Friday we went and got my very first Christmas tree!! We went to a local tree farm and everyone helped me pick one out - my mom actually spotted the final decision. Morgan cut it down and everyone helped transport it back to my 3rd floor apartment and decorate it.

Mr. Tree has been probably the biggest reason I have been in such a cheerful Christmas mood - I can't wait everyday to come home and turn it on and water it - I like to turn off all the lights at night before I go to bed and just sit with the Morgman and talk and enjoy it all. 

And I'm proud to say that I have singlehandedly {except for the 5 days I was in St. Louis and Morgan babysat} kept Mr. Tree alive, which according to my step dad lost him 5 dollars to my mom - Who bets that I will kill a beautiful Christmas Tree?!!? In your face, Gary.

On Saturday we went to dinner with Morgan's family and afterwards headed to YoLo of course!  It was a hit - and a wonderful way to end a wonderful visit. 

Thanks Mom and Gary for making your way to see me this Thanksgiving, I love you!

List!

So my "holiday break" {consisting of 1 vacation day and 1 flex day} starts around 3:30ish tomorrow afternoon

and I can't wait!

I took a break from my online class module at work and compiled a list of what I want to get accomplished over the break.

I would say its a little lengthy for the mere 4 days I have to complete it -

 but it has me focused and super excited for all the fun things we get to do!

So here's to crossing things off the list! :)

4 things:

1.



Madeline is growing up so fast! 

She loves all things that sparkle or dangle {aka ALL my jewelry}

she gets into everything

 she waves "bye" {although awkwardly}

she knows when you say "no" and just gives a playful smile

and she is almost walking!

2.

have I mentioned that the best thing about every week is date night?

well, it is.

{and lucky for me, this guy loves them too}

maybe its because I fully support his {ok, our} addiction to YoLo.

Oh, have I mentioned our very fave frozen yogurt place, yet?

why yes I have. a few times.

well just in case you are just now hearing about it... go NOW

we go every week. :)

3.

Morgan's mom's {Karen} birthday was in November.

and since she is an amazing cook {especially her cakes}

I knew I couldn't trump her cake-making-abilities

so instead - we got her GiGi's cupcakes

{like the one's Morgan got me for our 1 year anniversary}

and they were just as delish-es as I remember.

4.

Did I mention that the Morgman cut down our tree?

He did.

and I loved it.

That's it.

Happy Friday!

sharing is caring

I stumbled upon this website awhile ago.. but I actually had to use it last week

and it worked beautifully!

I found that thing {aka my phone} in no time flat {that doesnt make sense, by the way}

and wasn't late getting out the door!

It was a miracle, for reals!

So I thought I'd share.

www.icantfindmyphone.com

easy to remember, eh?

I have a new pet

And it's a my very own

Christmas Tree!

I love it!

more to come of the very wonderful Thanksgiving weekend...

Random Thoughts

I am pretty much worthless here at work today, and I'm about to finish up my last online class for my class in December.....

{I still don't get taking classes to attend a class. I thought prerequisites were done!}

.... and I have a bazillion random thoughts running through my head. Thought I'd share so I can continue on with my work day {which at the time of typing is 1 HOUR AND COUNTING}

• Making lists helps me keep organized like for reals. My Christmas shopping is in full swing and if I didn't have a list I would be broke!
• Morgan and I have been talking about starting our own traditions - not only with Christmas but all the holidays. We've had a lot of chats about what we did growing up. As of now we both agree on Christmas Eve PJ's and a few others. I stumbled upon a post in the blogworld that gave me the greatest idea for gifts for Christmas. Morgan and I are going to tweak it a little bit to fit 'us' - and I'll share it with you after the holiday!
• CHEEZ-ITs + Diet Coke = delish.
• There are so many weddings going on in my life right now. Not my wedding of course, but people's in my life. Sandra, Kristen, Jenn. Plus all my college friends are getting hitched all over the country. There are bound to be more the beginning of the year. I love being surrounded by love!
• I've started to love feeling sore after I work out. I used to hate it - like I would seriously avoid working out hard just because I knew it would hurt later. Morgan has brought a whole new perception of fitness into my life and I really appreciate my body getting a good work out - and when its sore just a mere few hours later, that means I did the job right. Like now. ouch.
• My mom and stepdad are coming in 5 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Oh yeah and speaking of Christmas {c'mon, keep up people}, I have a lot of siblings. I'm glad we draw names, it helps to make my gift that much more special and unique. Instead of just getting 5 I-tunes giftcards and calling it a day. Though I don't think they would be sad about that at all now that I think about it. oh well.
• Oh how thankful I am for the life I have. For the freedoms that surround me. For the truth that I have. {these feelings the aftermath of watching Hotel Rwanda and crying my eyes out. How cruel this world is sometimes}
• Morgan's amazing ideas! = Double date night, complete with dinner, fire & smores.
• Any thoughts about Accutane? I'm thinking about it a. lot.
• Is it weird that I have an overwhelming urge to buy stuff {for myself!}?? And not just clothes {but yes, a lot of that}. but hair stuff. and shoes. and cameras. and film. and rugs. and coffee tables. and frames. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME. its the season of GIVING. not getting. I'm seriously demented.
• On that note... this is my favorite site for beautiful things right now. I want every one.
• Is it weird that I just 'justified' this post? Work + my OCD is ruining me.



yep - these guys are coming for Thanksgiving!



at the pumpkin patch with Madeline in October.
afterwards we realized that it looks like she's our kid. oops.
and yes that was taken on Morgan's phone = blurrific



by the way my coworker who took this immediately said afterward
"now that, is facebook worthy". wow.



Are there any Mormons here tonight?

As an early Christmas present I got us tickets to the Dane Cook comedy show when Morgan found out he was coming about a month ago.

We got pretty good tickets to begin with - but then got upgraded when we got our tickets scanned..



see?? that's with no zoom!

Dane's portion was great - but his openers were hilarious too.

{J. Chris Newberg and Al del Bene}

During Al del Bene's bit he mostly talked about raising his 1-year-old son

{which made both of us think of Madeline}

and the topic soon turned to religion. He started to talk about how he might raise him Mormon, just as a 'cruel joke' since he was raised Catholic.

So as everyone started laughing he goes,
 "Are there any Mormon's here tonight?"

So of course Morgan and I start yelling and clapping

along with maybe 4 or 5 other people in the place.

Al stopped in his tracks and goes,
"Really??................... Shouldn't you be at home or something?"

I lost it. {it's true. we should have been home. it was Sunday.}

He proceeded to make a few jokes about Mormons but nothing terrible - it was hilarious.
I'm all about laughing at myself.

This was part of his hilarious-ness

Anyways - it was a fun night, and my first comedy show!

We were glad that Dane came through Memphis {his first time!} and we had to oppurtunity to go!

Thanks for an amazing night, my love!



Clutter + Content

This is my desk.

Welcome to my life of clutter, I'm fully aware of it

and I'm totally content with it.

just lovely.

Today is Wednesday

but this Wednesday is my Friday.

halle-freakin-lujah

{my old testament professor used to say that. ha.}

and for some reason I'm feeling all lovey dovey today.

and I like it.

I feel so fortunate to have love in my life.

my family. my friends.

and Morgan. especially him.

I've had the love of my family since the day I was born.

And my friends, the real ones, their love I've felt for years.

and I'm so lucky for all of it.

but this love, this love that has developed over the past year {and 2 months}

has literally changed my life.

every morning I wake up grateful I have the chance to feel this unwavering, unconditional love for another human being -

who feels the same exact feeling for me.

there's no inequality. no doubt. no missing piece.

I feel whole in a way that I never really felt was possible, or knew I needed

until I met Morgan.

I know we have miles and miles to go, so much to learn,
and many mountains to climb over

but how comforting it is to know I won't be doing it alone -
I'm not doing it alone right now.

It's days like these, where I wake up, shower, and a sleepy eyed sumo-wrestling-shirt-wearing boy walks in my door at 6:30 AM to make me breakfast.

 just so we can see eachother and spend time together for oh, about a half hour, before we both jet off to our run-of-the-mill-day-to-day lives.

and times where he looks up from his studying and says 'thankyou for all you did tonight' even though he's said it a million times.

and it was just dinner.

that he even helped with {i can't for the life of me cut onions}

and those moments when I'm so frustrated, so annoyed, and all have to do is dial his number and hear his voice on the other end and

know it's all going to be ok.

and when holding his hand is all that's really necessary.

no words, no discussion, no music on the radio. just that reassurance -

that we're here...together.

and that moment when I walk in the door from traveling all week for work - sick -

and I find a vase of flowers, my favorite chocolate,

and the sweetest note {on a post-it note, which by the way may be the best part} ever

and he does it all for me.

I'm lucky, and everyday I gives thanks for that.

only one of the many surprise bouquets. :)

Drum roll please............

This year Morgan and I were 

Fred and Wilma Flintstone!

--no thanks to my creative thinking {my mom gave me the idea}--

After a week of measuring, and sewing, and threading and gluing,

{and some colorful curse words thrown in for good measure}

our costumes were created

and though they aren't perfect

I learned a lot through the process, and I think they turned out pretty good

{and bonus: everyone thought they were store bought! boo ya!}

and of course the night couldn't end without some drama...

we weren't the only Fred and Wilma.....

on the bright side: we {all} got 2nd place in the costume contest! 

It was a very Happy Halloween 

love, Fred and Wilma

Maddy Face turns numero UNO.

So I think that everyone knows Morgan has a sister - who is exceedingly younger than he is - and well, she finally turned one!

I remember when I met Morgan I didn't meet his family until about 2 weeks into when we were dating - which was about 2(ish) months after we met. He had told me that his mom was prego - but not how far along (8 months by the way) - and when I met her, his dad and his brothers (who are 21 and 12), I won't lie... I was a little surprised. But, so was Madeline. 

When she was born I was actually out of town for work. She was born on a Monday and I met her that Friday. Morgan had sent me pictures of her from the hospital, and then throughout the week, and  so I already knew she was adorable (and tiny). When I met her that Friday though, I fell in love.

Over the past year I have gotten to know this little fire ball and her personality has completely blossomed into a little girl. and I'm still in love.

pumpkins and music.

This October has been crazy, to say the least.

But it has been packed full of memories, too, and that's what's important.

When we were both {finally} in town together on a Saturday we all went to the Farmer's Market/Pumpkin Patch to pick out a pumpkin for Madeline's first {well, technically second} real Halloween. She was just happy we let her mess with dirt/large objects without taking them away :) 

Later that day we went down to Minglewood Hall and caught the 3OH!3 concert.

It. Was. Amazing.

The end. :)

Hope...

I don't know why but I was looking back on my blog and read this post - from right after the new year.

and it became entirely evident that I have not made any progress.

OK so that's not exactly true - but during the moments when I begin to worry entirely too much it feels like I'm 15, 18, 21 again - and haven't learned a thing.

Deep down I know that I have, I know that I have come a long way from who I used to be

more mature

more aware

more wise

And then there are times, times that seem much more vivid in my mind than those where I have felt solace, that I feel like I have actually taken 10 steps backwards.

I feel lost

I feel uncertain

I feel aching.

And as I look back on those two conflicting thoughts, and the many experiences that go along with them, I'm grateful

for the contrast of happiness and sorrow

because I find my happiness great outshines the darkness of uncertain times

Though sometimes I may not notice until after

after too many tears have been spilt

and my eyes are a little too puffy

after I have felt empty for no reason at all

I do finally notice the difference.

and it gives me hope.

Hope in uncertainty - my 15, 18, 21 year old selves would laugh at the 23 year old me for even thinking that

{23 and 8 months, as Morgan would remind me}

but I know its true. 

However uncertain the future is 

However overwhelming it seems

and however incapable I feel

I know there is hope. for me. for Morgan and I {for us} to be

indescribably happy.

together.

I may have to remind myself every day - every hour -

whatever it takes

but truth has a way of changing someone for the better...

over time of course

And this hope, this faith in the future, is so amazingly true.